It’s been awhile since I’ve posted. I’ve been trying to figure out what I wanted to say. Or if I even wanted to say anything… We sold our house… let me re-phrase Matt sold our house. I hadn’t lived there for 6 months. It’s a very bittersweet end, on one hand I’m glad it’s gone and we both needed the money to fund new projects, new lives… but I worked so hard to make that house beautiful. So many projects done, so many projects in progress. Below is about as far as I got with the kitchen cabinets, I hung a couple more doors before I left. Sanded, stained, sealed, new veneer, handles and hinges, the interiors all painted teal and lined with cork. They looked fantastic.
New tub, new tile, new vanity, all the walls painted, the wall we torn out, so much cleaning, so much painting. All gone. When I first moved out, I was so upset and sad but I’ve realized over the last few months, I’ve left many rentals before and I worked hard to make them beautiful knowing I would leave. I can and will make anywhere I live just as wonderful, I just never entertained the notion that I would have to leave this house:
I think that’s been the hardest part of this transition, trying to re-imagine and redefine who you are to yourself and then presenting that to others. I’m not a happy married woman living with her husband in our beautiful home… but I hadn’t been that person for years. That was the image of myself I kept in my mind, that’s what I told people. I’m separated, I’m living with my parents again, and I’m very happy there. I’m working full-time, I go to yoga, I try to drink enough water, and get enough sleep… In short I’m taking care of myself. Endings are always sad and I will miss all the things I’m leaving behind, but I know I’m on the path to a much brighter future for the first time in a long time. I hope Matt is doing the same.